Sunday, October 6, 2013

A Miracle!


        As I sit down to write, my heart is very filled with emotion.  I am normally a very private person who keeps things to myself, but we have been so touched by the outpouring of love, concern and especially prayers by our family, friends and people we don't even know that I felt strongly that I needed to share our experience in hopes of strengthening others as we have been strengthened by you.  We all have trials and we all need each other to strengthen us when our knees are weak and we are hardly able to stand.  Thank you everyone for giving us that strength to stand when we were so very weak.

               Several years ago my father told me a story that has had a profound effect upon me.   A tree grew at our local church building.  It was a beautifully shaped tree that was full of life. 

               One day the beautiful tree simply fell over.  Astonished and puzzled over what had happened and lamenting over the loss of the tree, a neighbor asked the gardener what had brought it down.

               “No roots,”  he said.  Everything it needed was in easy reach and the roots didn’t develop.  Without a deep root system, it couldn’t hold itself up.”

               I have thought a lot about this story lately and especially in regards to what has happened over the last two weeks.   I had to really examine how deep my roots of faith went and had to trust in God, even when it was extremely difficult and we did not know the outcome.  It was ultimately our faith that sustained us to not fall and to remain strong in such a very difficult time.   
 

               Here is our story:

               Saturday, September 21, 2013 David, Clarissa and I joined my family in running a 5K run in Provo, Utah.  We run races all the time and this was nothing new especially for David.  David is an avid runner and can run 5K runs quite quickly.  I was going to walk to help with the little one.  My niece, Ellie, who is eight years old really wanted to run the race but most of the adults except David were going to walk to help with the "little runners."  David happily consented to run with her and I believe this was the first of many miracles that saved his life.  David could have exerted himself much more than he did, but because he held way back and ran with Ellie he was spared from heavy exertion and sweating.  Looking back and knowing what I do now, had he ran at full capacity like he normally would have he might have collapsed and died at the race.

               Interestingly, Ellie had her own set of trials the same time David was sick.  Ellie had surgery  to remove a lesion on her scalp.  The doctors were very worried and thought it was most likely a very serious form of melanoma.  Many prayers were offered in her behalf and the results came back favorable.  It wasn't as serious as first thought which was a miracle in and of itself.  We are so grateful for this outcome.

               After the race we went home and David took a nap.  He woke up not feeling good and by the night time was very fatigued and starting to feel very sick to his stomach. 

               Over the course of the next few days his symptoms worsened and he seemed to have a very bad case of the stomach flu.  After throwing up and not feeling good for several days, I took him to the doctor on Tuesday.  The doctor said it was the stomach flu, gave him some medicine and told him the flu was going around and it could last seven to ten days.  He cautioned us that if he kept throwing up to go to the ER for some fluids as he might get dehydrated.   

               Tuesday night David threw up every twenty minutes the entire night so by morning he was so weak and ill I could barely get him out to the car to drive him to the ER.  We arrived at the ER fully  expecting to have him get a few liters of IV fluids and he would be fine.  We had no idea that he would soon be fighting for his life in extremely critical condition. 

               Upon arriving at the ER, they started him on IV fluids and took some blood.  About twenty minutes later, the doctor came into our room and said, "David is not going anywhere.  We are going to admit him right away."  He was then taken to the ICU in the hospital.  His sodium levels were critically low.  Normal levels are between 135-140.  The doctor told us that he usually admits people to the hospital at 120 and they are usually having seizures and in a coma.  David's level was 103.  The ER doctor, who was an older gentleman who had probably been practicing for many years said, "I have never seen a sodium level this low.  I am surprised you are not having seizures."

               This was alarming news.  It was very unexpected and quite frightening.  The doctors at first weren't quite sure what was causing his sodium levels to be so low but whatever the cause at that moment they needed to get his levels up.  David's condition began to deteriorate quite quickly.  There was a challenge however.  The doctors could not raise his sodium levels too fast because  if the levels were raised too quickly he could get what is called demyelination of the brain which is literally the brain falling apart or separating.  If this happens it is very serious and often deadly.  They could only raise the sodium levels from six to ten points per day safely in order to prevent demyelination  from occurring. 

               The next day and a half David's body did not respond to the medication to increase his sodium levels.  His levels were still at 105, a very critical level.  During this time there were many tests done and the doctors discovered that he had Addison's disease and that he was having an Addisonian Crisis.

               I was very grateful to have a diagnosis, but I was, however, very worried as David's condition continued to worsen rapidly. 

               Throughout the span of the next day, David's sodium levels jumped from 108 to 127.  The sharp unexplained increase was very alarming to the doctors, nurses and to me as it could very likely mean demyelization of the brain.  The doctors were quite concerned about this. 

               David did begin to show signs of demyelination.  I don't know quite how to explain my feelings as I saw this happen to his body.  I thought my heart would break.  He deteriorated quickly.  His speech became slow and slurred.  His eyes became glazed over and one could see he was very ill.  Tears  aren't adequate enough to express the pain I was feeling.  I was completely and utterly helpless and all I could do was trust in the doctors and especially in Heaven but I must admit, it was very difficult.

               On Sunday, September 29, 2013, in the afternoon, David's condition became very critical.  I was alone with him in his room, silently praying.  In my desperation I began to plead for prayers from all of you.  The doctor came in and examined him.  David was very slow to respond if responsive at all.  After examining him, the doctor pulled me aside and told me to prepare myself for the worst; he may not make it.  The doctor could not promise any good outcome as he had all the signs of demyelination. 

               I had every reason to believe what the doctors were telling me. I had seen what death looked like before.  Thirteen years ago I was in the hospital with my mother.  She was in the final stages of breast cancer and was in the same condition as David was in --non-responsive.  She ultimately passed away.

               I thought I would literally collapse into a heap on the floor hearing these words from the doctor.  The thought of being without David and moving forward without him pulled every heart string I had and is beyond my capacity to describe.   I was in a pitiful condition both physically, emotionally and spiritually.

               It was a miracle on my behalf in that at that exact moment when I was ready to collapse into a heap, our church leaders--our stake president and his counselor came.  It was not by coincidence.  They came at the perfect moment to hold me up.  They were literally angels sent to me to strengthen me in  my darkest hour.

               I finally gained composure and felt strengthened by them.  They then gave David a very sacred and powerful Priesthood blessing that gave me hope and courage to move forward.  As they were giving David the blessing I couldn't help but think of the New Testament and how Jesus laid his hands upon many and they were healed.  He later gave that Priesthood authority to his Apostles and they too were able to heal the sick.  How grateful I was that, that same Priesthood power had been given to worthy men in our day and it could heal just as it healed others anciently.  I earnestly pled that the blessing of healing would be granted to David.

               David's condition remained extremely critical but I had to leave for a while because as much as I wanted to be with David, I still had to be a mother to Clarissa and she needed me.  She was struggling at home with no naps and a different environment and schedule.  I will be forever grateful for those who were taking care of her.  I knew she was in good hands but she need Mommy.  I was so torn trying to juggle my time, energy, and strength between two people I love dearly.  It was taking a toll on me in many ways.  As much as I needed and wanted to sleep and eat it had been days now since I had rested or had something really to eat.  It wasn't because I didn't want to sleep or eat it was because  my stomach was in knots and my mind would not rest to allow me to sleep.

               I went home literally commending my dear husband into the hands of the Lord while I went home to tend to my dear daughter.  Not long after being home, I received a call from the doctor telling me to come to the hospital NOW!  I had received a similar phone call when my mother was critically ill in the hospital and we didn't get to the hospital in time before she passed away.  I knew what I had to prepare myself for but pleaded with the Lord for a different outcome and the faith to make it happen.  It was one of the longest drives of my life to the hospital.  Trembling, I entered the ICU unit barely able to think or walk.  They had taken David to get an MRI of the brain.  This would show how much demyelization he had of the brain.  When the results came back I think it shocked the doctors as well as all those taking care of him.  It showed no signs of demyelination. 

               Over the course of the next several hours miracles began to happen.  Many tender and sacred things occurred that allowed me to know God is not far, prayers are heard, the Priesthood of God is real and those who hold it have incredible power, angels really do minister to us here  and miracles have not ceased.

               It wasn't until later that I learned of the incredible outpouring of prayers in David's behalf at the exact moment when his life was hanging by a thread.  After David was given the priesthood blessing, the first counselor in our stake presidency, who is also in our ward congregation, went back to our ward, which was still in session and gathered all the members and asked them to extend their fast and pray for David.  Also so many others saw my pleadings for prayers  in his behalf and began to pray.  A dear friend wrote  me later and said,

               "On Sunday night when I read your plea for prayers, I went to my room and started praying for your husband.  I immediately felt like I had tapped into some kind of spiritual current.  It made me think of those old "party lines" you hear of back in the old days, where phones in multiple houses all connected and everyone could hear everyone else.  I know hundreds of people were praying for the same things as I was, and I could feel everyone's faith.  It was a really spiritual moment for me.  I don't think I will ever forget it." 

               It is not possible to put into words my feelings.  My faith alone could not have saved David's life and I mean that literally.  I realized more than ever how we need each other to make it through this life.

               I was recently reading in Mark 6:47-51 in the Bible.  This scripture passage is where the disciples of Christ are in a ship on the Sea of Galilee and a big storm arises.  The disciples began to toil and struggle.  Jesus was on the shore and saw them toiling and rowing.  The wind was blowing contrary to where they wanted to go.  It seemed Jesus watched the disciples from the shore for sometime fully aware of their struggles.  Then about the fourth watch, Jesus went unto them. 

               These passages of scripture really touched my heart.  The Lord usually does not come to us in our struggles until the forth watch or right before morning--meaning He lets us struggle all night until the night seems too hard to take and the darkness is about to overcome us.  And yet through  it all  Jesus has his eye on us from the shore as we struggle in the storm and just when we feel we are going to sink with despair He comes unto us.  It is interesting to note that Jesus came unto his disciples but He would have passed them by  had they not cried out to Him.

               I felt exactly like this.  The night and storm of the last two weeks seemed long and I was so weak I literally thought I was beginning to sink, but at the most critical moment when it seemed David was not going to make it, the Lord came to me and gave me peace.  In my darkest hour, I came to know the Lord.

               It has been a sobering experience.  Three days after I received the phone call from the doctor telling me David wasn't going to make it, he walked out of the hospital on his own power.  There is no other word than Miracle!

               I am so grateful David's life was spared.  I am keenly aware that life is fragile and that lives aren't always spared even with a lot of faith, as was in the case with my mother.  So I am eternally grateful for the tender mercy that David's life was spared.  There are not words just awe and gratitude.

               David still has a road to recovery but is doing quite well considering the circumstances he was in.  To all those who have prayed, provided meals, service and concern there aren't words to adequately express our thanks.  David and I have prayed many many times for the Lord's riches blessings to be with those who have been praying for us.  We love you!